UPDATED…
There seems to be an argument on Amazon on my book as my “half sister”- who is actually my brother’s child- is leaving crap on my Amazon reviews. Claiming she want’s to be left out- this is what is being left on my book site. She came after me- although she is on my blog and my posts. I haven’t sought her out- in any way, shape or form- although she admits trying to destroy me and everything that I am doing.
My sister Kathy says…”Note from My Sister Kathy in Reponse to Our Stepmother’s (Joanne C. Shurter) Daughter Christina Marie Blumkin/Shurter
Well, I have to say I was stunned to find out that Christina Shurter Blumkin has taken it upon herself to assassinate my character via emails to those interested in my speaking. It is amazing since I don’t think I have even seen Christina in the last decade. The decade before was composed of brief “hellos” maybe a half a dozen times. I am not entirely certain that she would even be able to recognize me if she passed me on the street (I know that I wouldn’t know her). So, she knows all of the finer points of my character, but she doesn’t even know what I look like? Hmmmm…
I guess Christina mentioned that she is very frightened of me. Oh, really? So, she attacks me behind my back (via “confidential” emails) and accuses me of being “crazy and a liar” because she is so terrified? That’s an amazing tactic. Let me explain it like this: You are absolutely frozen with fear when you see a lion, so you creep up on it while it’s sleeping, and poke it with a stick. Yes, that is always the best way to handle people and situations that frighten you. Uh huh. I am convinced. NOT.
The truth is that I have had very little to do with the Survivor Community. Everyone has to choose their own path towards healing, and my approach has been to move on and leave the pain and instability behind me. As such, I attended the University of Nebraska School of Social Work and obtained my baccalaureate and Master’s degrees. I graduated Magma cum Laude. It was a big deal for me because I did that IN SPITE of my childhood and IN SPITE of a very toxic family. I worked successfully as a dual diagnosis therapist, and I volunteered many hours with the domestic violence programs in Omaha. In fact, I received the Extra Mile Award from the YWCA for my work an domestic violence advocate.
I hold the victims of sexual assault and domestic violence very close to my heart. It was a constant throughout my childhood, and there are court records that attest to this very fact. Christina is 18 years younger than I. She wasn’t even born before I had left home. I lived in a foster home from the age of 16 years old until I graduated from High School. Why? Because I was living in a violent household. There are also court records that stand in testament to my experiences. I have copies of most of the paperwork.
My recent willingness to speak at a survivor’s conference has to do with the need for the survivor community to understand that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There is life after abuse. I know it. I’ve lived it. I have walked through the valleys just like some of them are now doing. However, I want to show them the way to the mountain top. My hope is to offer encouragement and help toward their future. Thus, the impact of my story is what happens AFTER the abuse. How does one go forward?
I am not interested in the past. I am interested in how one takes their status as victim and replaces it with strength and resolve. My belief is that not only are we survivors but we are thrivers as well. My belief is that the best revenge is to live your life well.
So, I am not interested in Christina’s rebuttal to my story. In fact, I am not even sure that she has ever heard my story. My concern is for her. Why do this? Indeed, I am interested in HER story because I am almost certain that she has one. For now, I am going to abandon my anger and hurt and focus on the future.
I have so many things yet to accomplish in my life. That’s where I choose to place my energy.
and this….”
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Christina Marie Shurter/Blumbkin says
“David,
Keep me out of this. Your reply to this post with Kathy’s comments means nothing to this reader nor does it validate any claims you have made. You are taking her comments out of context and using them for your benefit.
Do not continue to use my name in online posts or blogs. I have nothing to do with you for a reason and you need not insert yourself into my life because you need attention. So, quite frankly, knock it off. Leave me out of it and get on with your life.”
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so I posted….
“I posted them Christina B. word for word. They are not being taken out of context. You do your best to stalk me to protect my stepmother- YOUR mom Joanne which is why I left the midwest- and so thinking you are out of this is laughable.
I have gone on with my life. No thanks to you- or your evil mother. And you have no idea what my childhood was even like- being years younger than I am. You are just protecting your mother.
Kathy, Felicity and I had a good laugh at your emails. Be careful- or I just might publish those on my blog to show what kind of psycho you and your mother are. ”
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Christina Marie Blumbkin says on Amazon…”Publish them. They would be the ONLY truthful thing written on your entire blog. Just make sure to post them AS THEY WERE WRITTEN. You aren’t the only one that keeps copies of emails that were written “just in case.”
You can lie as much as you want David. As you like to repeatedly imply, but take no responsibility for yourself, is that we are all responsible for our own actions.
You know what you are writing (or maybe you don’t because you are so mentally ill that you have started believing the lies that you spew) are false and simply based out of malice.
It has ALWAYS been so with you, Kathy, Cindy and Steven. Again, another reason why my Mother and I tried not to have any contact with you.
However, having the same Father made that difficult. However, even HE decided to have NO contact with either you or Kathy until the very end WHEN HE COULDN’T EVEN SPEAK.
SO, your assertions that he “admitted” to having “skeletons in the closet” was physically IMPOSSIBLE as he couldn’t even communicate when you bothered to visit him and disrupt the family yet again.
And, I do find it interesting that the ONLY time that you tried to have a amicable relationship with him was when he was on his deathbed, couldn’t speak and YOU came looking to reconcile hoping to get a good payout in the end. Then, when he passed and you got a mere $100 dollars because of his complete and utter disdain for you, YOU and KATHY decided to take my Mother to court to contest the will because you didn’t get the payout you were looking for.
You see, there are TWO sides to every story and just because you and Kathy assert something DOES NOT make it true. We have our side as well. We just chose to take the higher road and not to go about self publishing a crappy book to try and continue the cycle of violence you and your side of the family choose to perpetuate.
My Mother tried to care for you, remove you from your biological Mother’s abusive and alcoholic home and tried to treat you like her own son. Yet, you persistently spit in her face. Literally and figuratively. And, yes, I do support her because I KNOW what lies, harm and hurt YOU have inflicted upon our family. I know what kind of person SHE is and what kind of person YOU are.
I’m not THAT much younger than you and have a great memory of what happened when we lived in Graettinger and afterwards. I also remember VERY well your initial plans to “discredit” my Mother and our Father when you started “writing” your early manuscript in your 20’s. That was the last time I deliberately came in contact with you.
I’ve wanted and had NOTHING to do with you and your siblings for over 20 years because of your consistent drama, malice and lies.
However, you continue to antagonize and threaten, which is typical for you. Always the aggressor. Always the manipulator. Yet somehow, you continue to always paint yourself the victim. Hmmm.
Back off David. Leave me alone. Leave my family alone. Go away and play in your pretend hole with Kathy’s “Brumps.” You two can have a happy life there. Just back off. Seriously. Leave me alone and out of it.”
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So I replied…
“lies lies and more lies. Mike was with me. And he WAS able to communicate in the end. And the funeral proceedings- which I have a copy of- shows how much your mother cared about my father. While you and Robbie sat so doped up that you just laughed through the whole thing.
Remember the charges you have in Arizona- dad told me about the distribution of cocaine that you are guilty of.
And your whole resume is a lie. You don’t have a degree- and went to school in Tempe- not california. This is the evidence I am going to publish.
The will was signed in Joanne’s handwriting- and we DIDN’T take anyone to court. In fact we dropped it. But only after we decided it was worthless to fight. But your mother was a huge part of that.
You have no idea what we experienced- and you ARE much younger. And just like your mother.
and 9 years younger is MUCH younger. You have no idea what my childhood was like.
and you should be careful what you say about Stephen- since he is your biological father. According to OUR father- he had a vasectomy and therefore NEITHER you nor Robbie can be dad’s children.”
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then Christina Marie Blumpkin/Shurter replied…
You really need some help. Seriously.
I am not 9 years younger than you. I know MY birthday as well as yours. I also know that Dad and Mom had custody of YOU beginning at the age of 3 and that Kathy CHOSE to go live with friends of the family when my Mom and our Dada married so never knew what was going on in your collective childhoods that somehow involved drug running, satanism, ritual abuse and child abduction. Interesting yet again.
I’m loving your timeline and how your dates never add up. It’s pretty interesting.
You attempted to contest the will but stopped because of some “coverup” that you and Kathy dreamt up = aka NO EVIDENCE.
Robb and I were NOT laughing throughout the whole funeral service, but that is beside the fact. The fact is that you and Kathy sat in the back like cowards and never ONCE made any attempt to communicate with either my Mom or the rest of our family.
I have no idea WHERE you would get the idea that I went to school in EITHER California OR Tempe because I never went to either. MY resume claims NEITHER.
However, I do, in fact, have a degree from an accredited 4 year University. And, at least I have a resume and NOT a police record and a list of collectors calling to find me like you.
Speaking of police records, I have NEVER been arrested and have, nor had, any pending charges against me. IN ANY STATE. Nor, have I ever “distributed cocaine” or any other drug for that matter. I wouldn’t know the first thing about doing so. So, again, another thing Dad “told” you when he was unable to communicate huh?! Brilliant.
Oh, and Michael was with you and is able to verify all of this? Well, where is Michael now David? Sick of your lies and bull just like the rest of us. Congrtaulations on being the first gay divorce on the books in Iowa. That’s something to REALLY be proud of. Good job making something of your life and your relationships. Maybe you should have focused on Michael since he was about the ONLY thing you had going for you rather than coming up with all of the crap that you continue to post about.
I urge you to get some serious mental help.
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then I replied…
okay- 8 1/2 years- since you were born in 77 and I was born in 76. you in April- me in Dec.
We have a copy of the funeral proceedings and it had nothing to do with courage but the fact that you danced on our father’s grave. You and Robbie sat and smirked the whole time.
You got busted in Arizona- YEARS before dad got sick. He told everyone about it.
And when did you last talk to Michael? He can’t stand you. 20 years ago? He wouldn’t recognize you now if he saw you. And Mike are very close- we got a divorce because I was miserable in a town where you and your mother stalked me. Of course you would assume you know- because you lie to yourself about everything!!
And at least I didn’t try to sleep with my nephews. You are known throughout the family as promiscuous. You slept with everyone you could.
Keep going Christina- we can air out all the family business. Oh= and you knowing about the brumps shows that you are familiar with Kathy’s abuse- who graduated Magdum Cum Laude with her masters. You guys say she is crazy- this point negates that.
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So my actual REAL sis and not our niece posted…
Kathy says… “Here, again, I am brought back to comment on subjects that are nobody’s business but my own. However, I have spent a lifetime being called names and accused of being a “liar and a cheat” by a woman who does nothing but inflict damage in other people’s lives. Christina, since you are following David’s blog and his Amazon listing so closely, I am going to address some of the concerns you have brought up. Given that we are 18 years apart, I really don’t know why anything you would say has ANYTHING whatsoever to do with my life experience. Be that as it may, I am going to respond, and this will be last response because I have no interest in maintaining this back and forth dialogue with you. It’s ludicrous.
Let me begin by telling you, that there are court records and placement records on my behalf. Actually, David also has access to court and placement records. The abuse I suffered is well-documented and is not a matter of “because my mother said so.” The records are currently in a storage locker in a file cabinet. Please don’t worry yourself that I cannot access them because I can and will should that become necessary. Or, you might wander on down to the courthouse and pull up some of the records yourself. They are likely archived at this point, but it wouldn’t be all that difficult. They are public records. My father was Robert Lynn Shurter Jr (in spite of the fact that he changed his name to Lynn so that he could ostensibly outrun a poor credit record and assume his father’s credit instead). My mother was Constance Levon Bannister. My maiden name was Kathy Susan Shurter. Look it up. Oh, and take your time, there are many records to peruse. I was placed with the Nebraska Children Home Society (also listed in the court documents).
Now, let me address some of your “concerns.” First of all, and most importantly, let me explain the brumps to you. This is highly personal because it details some of the abuse that I suffered as a small child. Indeed, I talked about the brumps when I was 2 or 3 years old. However, I do remember clearly (I wish I didn’t). You are the mother of a small child. Tell me, what would you say to your son if he told you that when he went to sleep at night, something resembling a hotdog came and hurt him. It made the sound of brump, brump, brump. From a child’s point of view, this is a clear description of childhood sexual abuse. So, actually, repeating this story, as you have, lends credence to the abuse that I suffered as a child. If that had been one of my children, I would have done all I could to protect them. But, I had abusive/neglectful parents, and I am relatively certain that my father did not want to discuss these issues with the authorities. No matter, it was discussed when I was 16 years old. I was placed in a foster home due to the horrific abuse that I suffered (not just with my biological parents, but with Dad and your mother).
Now, I grew up in a terribly abusive home. Mother (my mother) was not abusive, but she was neglectful. She was an alcoholic, as you mentioned. She was NOT physically or sexually abusive. When she wasn’t drunk, she was actually very caring. Dad drank as much as she did when I was a kid. It was a big joke for him, and he loved to tell people about the time he came “home” drunk only to find out that he was in a stranger’s house. He thought that was funny; I think it’s pathetic.
My mother preferred Gordon’s Gin. Your mother prefers Passport Scotch (and plenty of it). Alcohol was the name of the game in my father’s second marriage and in his third. Yes, your mother was his third wife. The first one (named Bonnie) promptly divorced him when the abuse started. You see, he was pretty handy with his fists. My mother divorced him under the grounds of mental cruelty. The domestic violence is detailed in her avadavit (sp?) at the courthouse. They were divorced in the days of divorce on certain grounds. The other grounds she mentioned were adultery. You see, your mother built her relationship with my father in the ashes of my parents’ marriage. She was the other woman.
Malice? No. Anger? Absolutely. I went through a lot after my parents divorced. I went to live with your mother and my father because they talked me in to filing papers naming my mother as neglectful. I did it because my mother was neglectful. Oh, and by the way, I was 13 years old during this whole shameful episode. Yes, my mother was a mess. She endured extreme physical violence (throughout her life), and she coped by drinking. She wasn’t capable of caring for me or David. She was too far engrossed in her own personal pain. Now that I am 58 years old, I look back on her with sympathy and forgiveness. She did not have an easy life.
When I came to live with Dad and your mother, my life became impossible. I was their slave. I was their built-in babysitter, and yes, I endured terrible abuse. First, I tried to run away, but then, I was brought back to even worse abuse. Ultimately, feeling that there was no escape, at the age of 16, I attempted suicide. What was my life like? Well…it was pretty crummy. Your mother doled out much worse abuse than anyone previously in my life. I ate my dinner on a plate on the floor because I was “a dog.” I was slapped and kicked, but I couldn’t defend myself against my father (because that would have been the inevitable outcome had I fought back against your mother), No, I didn’t have the same father you had. My father was 20 years younger than your father. He was strong, and he was a violent man. When I tried to defend myself verbally, I was beaten down and called “Connie” (my mother’s name). The second time I ran away, I was placed in a psychiatric hospital by your mother and father. The hospital determined that I was living with a lot of abuse, and they moved for placement outside of the home. These documents are also at the Courthouse. However, the supporting information is not because I was a juvenile. Don’t worry, though, as an adult, I obtained copies of all of it. Those are also in storage. I requested all of it when I was in my 20’s because I was interested in the professional notes. They are really interesting. They describe your mother as “austere and abusive.”
Your explanation that I was after money is disgusting. Actually, I was after a comeuppance for your mother. When Dad died, she had to dance on his grave. She mailed me photos of my college graduation (both from undergrad and grad school). Included in that nasty-gram, was a long letter detailing her mistreatment of my father at her hands. I have read the letter once and only once. I cried my eyes out. You see, I really did love Dad. I think he was a flawed person. He didn’t have the best of childhoods either. Yes, he abused me. But, in the curious world of abuse survivors, I loved my father. I didn’t want to see him go to jail, be harmed, nothing like that. I wanted him to ask me to forgive him. I wanted resolution between us. Contrary to what you may believe (or have been told), Dad was verbal when I went to see him. Your mother was at work. Joanie (however she spells it), his aide, was there as was my best friend. Dad took me on a tour of the house and we talked for close to 3 hours. He asked for my forgiveness, and I told him that I had forgiven him long before, that I loved him, and I wished him peace. It is not important to me what you believe about that. It’s important to me, and that is what matters at this point.
Yes, I did want a copy of the will, which without an attorney, I was unable to obtain. The will appears to me to have been forged. It’s pretty clearly your mother’s signature. But, it was never about money. Oh, and by the way, my token bequest was $1000, but Dad isn’t the one that did that. Your mother is the person responsible, and that is what I wanted to know. I wanted to see if my Dad betrayed me in the end. Had I received money as a result of the legal action, I would have donated it to a domestic violence program. I didn’t want his money. I wanted his love.
Needless to say, I was infuriated when I went to his memorial service and the title was ” A Piece of Art or a Piece of Work.” Your mother paraded as the victim (not new to me…typical behavior of perpetrators). Dad was not there to defend himself. Well, her letter to all of us was basically the same. It made me see red. I wanted to read the will. After I read the will, and I realized that Dad had nothing to do with it, I decided to drop the legal proceedings. You see, I believe in Karma. I don’t want to go after your mother. That’s God’s job.
Life is very short. I think you will find that in the end, money really doesn’t matter that much. What matters are the relationships in your life. What matters is that you can face yourself in a mirror and honestly say that you tried your hardest and that you were a good and fair person. No, I am not in to revenge. My interest is to go forward now. I have already visited and revisted my childhood. I don’t need to wallow around in the muck. It’s over for me now.
I have responded to this because I know that you have your own stories, if you are honest with yourself. There are 18 years between us. You were not even a gleam in your father’s eye during my childhood. I have only given you a brief glimpse of what I endured. I don’t think there needs to be additional conversation regarding these issues. Thus, I will respond no more. Your approval or disapproval is meaningless at this point. We all have our story to tell. Your opinion in no way negates my life experience.
Take care of yourself, and try to be a better parent than your parents. That is the task for us all (and I do mean everyone).
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so Christina Blumpkin replied…
David,
Thank you so much for posting Kathy’s response. It is beautifully written. A tragic story indeed. My sarcasm is absolutely intended. I do not doubt that Kathy had a challenging childhood and early teenage years. Nor does it matter what I think.
That being said, this would all be a non-issue if you would both just stop involving my family in this whole ridiculous public production.
Kathy, if you could get David back on the marionette strings you had him on in the first place, that might be a good first step.
Remember, it was YOU both who threw the first stone. Many times over. Through letters, calls, lies propogated throughout the family to get back to me, my brother and Mother.
You’ve acted with nothing but contempt and jealousy for us since my Mother married our Father.
Enough is enough and that’s all I’ve been saying. Knock it off. If you are so interested in “healing” and “moving forward” then why is there always a new antagonizing post every time one turns around?
Enough.
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so I replied…
because you are constantly sending out emails to try and stop me from doing anything. Felicity doesn’t even know you and yet she got a series of emails from you trashing both Kathy and I and trying to steer her away with your lies.
I don’t like you Chris- and have absolutely no respect for you. Nor have I ever. Kathy VALIDATES my childhood in a way that you are incapable of. She is neither crazy nor a liar. And I am not going to just stand by while you try to dictate my life through nasty communications- which you have admitted too.
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Left from my Sister Kathy’s Oldest son Chris…
Christine: I am sick of the attitude toward my mother. How dare you. First of you wanna talk contempt? I tried to have a relationship long ago with you, Robbie, and my ” Grandmother JO”. I remember her attitude towards me and my siblings. ” Don’t call me Grandma. I am too young.”. You talk as if Jo hasn’t victimized people. I remember coming here to Nebraska only to be locked in a basement with a tv and not being allowed upstairs or outside like “Flowers in the Attic.” I never did anything to your so called family yet you ridicule mine? How dare you. I remember you trying to seduce my friends. Kissing them, flashing them, and being a outright tramp. So careful what you say as others may remember things too. By the way so I am clear too. Grandpa interfered several times regards to my siblings and mother. Lies told then and him trying to intimidate me. So yes I can see some abusive tendencies. Difference I wasn’t afraid of him and more then capable to think for myself. He admitted to my face he had lots of respect for me because of it. I was shunned and treated like crap from your side and never deserved it. So if you don’t like things then stay on your side of the tracks and keep your big mouth shut.
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Then Christina Marie Shurter/Blumpkin responded…
Christopher,
I remember meeting you maybe 3 times in my life. I never met your friends nor did I ever spend any significant time with you and your family. Probably due to the fact that my Mom wouldn’t allow it considering all of the lies that Cindy, Kathy, David and Steven spread like wildfire. Fearing that it would pass on to the next generation…So, yes, you probably were shunned. You can thank your Mother, Aunt, and Uncles for that.
What’s the saying…slap me once, shame on you. Slap me twice, shame on me. Well, we weren’t going to continue to get proverbially slapped by those in your family again and again and again.
And, HOW DARE I SAY THINGS AGAINST YOUR FAMILY?!?!
Whose Mother is accusing the other of being a child trafficking, child abusing satanist?
I didn’t start this crap. I just want out of it.
David likes to continue to stir the pot while your Mom sits back and feeds him bs. So, yea, I’ll keep my mouth shut. I’ve done it this long. As long as I don’t have to hear any more crap about my Mother being an abusive, satanist. Does that sound fair?
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So I replied…
lie lie lie. everyone lies but you. funny- you and chris went to school together- and Chris is still friends with all those people.
It just shows your parents were/are abusive. Take it out on the kids.
And if you wanted out of it- you have an interesting way of doing it- sending out nasty emails and commenting on my book. You are full of it.
James Fox. Joe Tarver Rich Eagan. Chris and Tony are still friends with them-and they remember you QUITE well. As well as Justin Ryder. and his clever nickname for you.
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Another post from Kathy’s Oldest Son Chris…
“You want a response Christina? First off my mother and David were born well before either you or I. Secondly if your a clinical psychologist then you should know there are many points and views and not all people are as they seem. I know your mom and dad when I was growing up. I remember the way I was treated. Yes I resented the way I was treated. You state you’ve only seen me 3 time? Sorry to argue but my 8th grade year you spent the summer at my mother’s home on 151st st in millard. Also you attended the same high school as I did for a year. So are you delusional? It’s also funny that 4 different people from different states who rarely spoke has similar stories to tell. I grew up around them so don’t tell me what is what. You really want to stay out of it then do just that. Be a grown up. You had drinking issues as a kid as well as were smoking. Vodka and marlboro lights ring a bell? Yes I am old enough to have been around and remember you and what you say is your family. I am a part of your family too and so are David and my mother. So believe what you like just remember there are us old enough to remember and just for the record too you’re not my age. You weren’t born in 1977. Your were born in 1974.”
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I should point out that the author of this review has only put his comments in Amazon for ONE book- mine. This person is nothing more than a shill- probably connected to my family in some way. But I find it interesting that MANY of the one star reviews are done like this- showing that they is a concerted effort to trash not only my book Rabbit Hole but also me as an individual as well.
http://www.amazon.com/review/R31W1PZMXFZX1F/ref=cm_cr_rev_detup_redir?_encoding=UTF8&asin=B007XKVXNS&cdForum=Fx2XXCW5FZUBAYP&cdPage=1&cdThread=TxJWEXLELZSVL9&newContentID=Mx3C1VNUT768CWE&store=digital-text#Mx3C1VNUT768CWE