Right now I am incredibly angry- which happens when I feel betrayed. I have been struggling as hard as I possibly can to get what happened here in Omaha exposed in order to help people understand the complexities of the situations by giving them a foundation to focus on- but also I have been doing what I can to support survivors and survivor advocates in the four years that I have been involved in the “survivor community”, and yet I find myself in a position which, at the base, is the question of whether I take the high road or the low road. This battle has been so long and arduous that I am not sure who to trust anymore- as those I have defended have taken the position of another who would publicly weave fairy tales which go directly against the truth of what I am trying to expose. Much of what I am fighting with trying to expose Omaha is a campaign of individuals who are desperately trying to discredit me through the Internets social media, as well as a media campaign to try and disengage our leaders from their indiscretions, as well as a government coverup in the form of covering their tracks. For example- Offutt Air Force Base is building a several million dollar update to STRATCOM and are getting ready to pour concrete into the bunkers below- similar to what the city did when allegations of snuff films being filmed in the basement dungeon of the Hollywood bar started surfacing- building a parking garage in it’s place. No evidence- no crime I guess, however- the truth is what it is, regardless. Many terrible things happened on that base- esp. when I was a child, and since I witnessed other children being abused as well as myself- I know that I am not alone in remembering the things that happened to us there and the “games” we were forced to play.

Nick Bryant, author of “The Franklin Scandal”, has entitled his speech at the upcoming Brick conference “The Franklin Scandal: The Continuing Cover-up”- which is funny since he is very much PART of the problem. He is just part of some strange systematic process that is focused solely on keeping the TRUTH of what happened here so ambiguous that it doesn’t really make sense to people, or it sounds incredibly probable but doesn’t have an ounce of truth to it. My father and my stepmother were involved with the very people who were involved, like Peter Citron- the columnist that went to jail for pedophilia, who was my mother’s best friend when they worked at the Sun News, and even transferred together to the Omaha World Herald when the Sun News went belly up. Dick Bishop- who was heavily involved- was the man who eventually raised my brother after he bought him from my parents with gifts and money. In fact- that is how it often worked around here- that parents sold their own children- which is exactly what Nick Bryant probably would never suggest about Noreen Gosch- and yet she has openly said just as much about her husband, so unless Bryant is a soothsayer- who is to say? Once told by Dick that he was “f***ing my brother at 10 and he loved it”, and having it validated by my brother when I asked about him about it years later- Bryant ROYALLY pisses me off going on and on like he is some expert when it is obvious to me that he doesn’t know shit about the reality of what happened here- and it angers me, as you can tell.

The person that I am angry with most is myself- for allowing myself to become distracted with all the drama that is being presented. Yes I was betrayed- but it isn’t like the person hasn’t done this before. And don’t get me started about the False Memory Foundation PP Squad’s spokesperson, oy. Interjecting myself into situations that really don’t benefit me in much of any way has been fruitless- ripe only with strife of the constant attacks I have endured on anything and everything that dealt with my personal character by an idiot who only knows me through the Internet and has no idea who I am as a person. Who is the bigger fool- the fool, or the one who fights with the fool? I guess that would be me, and so- finding myself with egg on my face, I must do as I generally do when I find myself in situations like this and wipe myself off and continue continuing on.

In my anger today- I felt to break away from the survivor community meant that I needed to destroy it- however, just because you can do a thing doesn’t mean you should DO a thing. The community is fragile at best, but it is often self inflicted, (at least for me)- and there are so very few of us who are willing to take a stand although our numbers are well into the thousands- which just frustrates me sometimes, esp. considering how powerful, strong, and compassionate we are as a whole. However- no one wants to fight, not realizing that is exactly what it is going to take to change things for the better. Taking a stand- finding my voice, and USING it was fundamental, not only in my own healing but also in my finding a place of focus. I do this because I, through my father’s crimes, have the chance to expose so much more than what is publicly known right now- and I am a fierce competitor when it comes to doing what I feel is right, which is getting the truth of what happened here out into the general public. Why do I care since my father is dead? Because the families of those who lost their lives aren’t- and society DESERVES the truth. I am SICK TO DEATH of hitting roadblocks every time I turn around simply because I want my family an their connections investigated. Basically because I don’t think that they acted alone- and I don’t think that the practice has stopped- which just may be behind our nation’s problems with child trafficking. As cold as it sounds, with as much that is at stake right now- if you aren’t behind me or beside me- then you are standing in the way and I will respond accordingly- which is the whole reason for tonight’s blog.